Sex-brain has ruined the English language

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It’s true. Most of us (childish) adults constantly get a giggle out of accidental double-entendres. To that end, many wonderful and delightful terms, animals and concepts have been RUINED by this inevitable reaction from our sexualized culture. I blame Brittany and her friend, Amy.

Here is my un-finished list of words you cannot say in context without someone thinking the other meaning.

Animals

  • Beaver
  • Pussycat
  • Anaconda
  • Dolphin
  • Rabbit
  • Donkey

Foods

  • Melon
  • Coconut
  • Peach
  • Sausage
  • Nuts
  • Tea Bag
  • Salad (tossed)
  • Berries

Things

  • balls
  • drill
  • bore
  • shaft
  • knob
  • plunger
  • carpet (and it’s drapes)
  • bush

Verbs

  • Come
  • Squirt
  • Thrust
  • Lance

I recommend: Radio

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Aside from the usual Pandora, Last FM, Pure Volume, Lala and other music aggregators, there are loads of places to get streaming music…Radio Stations!
Real, old fashioned radio with DJs and all! But the only way that RADIO is bearable is for it to be foreign. Overseas radio is even interesting with ads because of accents and languages, and a lot of our socialist neighbors have taxpayer funded stations with NO ads at all! Bonus.
The downsides are the weird time alignments. UK radio starts the night shift as I am driving home from work, and Australia is always a day ahead (hearing “How is your Monday Afternoon” on a Sunday evening is depressing)

But here are the stations I listen in to
Absolute Radio : UK (London)
Great music, funny DJs and news. Lots of ads are balanced out by lots of music. Their website is a great source for band interviews and podcasts.
Triple J : Australia (Sydney)
Public ‘Youth’ radio so completely ad-less! Cutting-edge, indie, and sometimes quite weird, you won’t hear these songs elsewhere. Famed for their early backing of Florence and the Machine, Tegan and Sarah and others, they have heard of all the cool bands before you have.
NRJ France (Paris)
Yah, it’s in French, and they speak 100mph, but they play good solid pop and have great dance hits party songs on the weekend.

Chic Cruiser

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Cruisers are in. There is no doubt.

Girls want to be that girl on a vintage bike, skirt or floral shorts flapping around your long taned legs. You may have cool sunglasses on, or a vintage scarf, or possibly a baguette in a basket.

You are carefree and stylish and your look alludes to a unique and creative lifestyle, filled with organic food, intelligent friends and unusual pursuits. You travel a lot and the man in your life probably has a beard and plays in a modern rockabilly band.

There are sites dedicated to this woman http://charikichi.tumblr.com/ and http://www.refinery29.com/hot-wheels-cruising-the-cooles.php as well as flickr groups http://www.flickr.com/groups/bicyclegirls/

And yeah, I wanna be one. I wanna be that chick, on her vintage cycle, cruisin to the market, and maybe go to the local craft brewery later on to hear some live music.

And check out this beauty, available for only $150

Bands I’ve Seen Live

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This is a sad little list. Not because of content, but brevity. I feel like I’ve seen more live shows. It is however, a diverse little list

  • Meatloaf @ The Point Depot, Dublin. My first ever concert. I was about 12, and a big fan because my Dad was.
  • Oasis @ The Point Depot, Dublin in 1997. Their ‘Be Here Now Tour’
  • Boyzone @ The Point Depot, Dublin. A week after seeing Oasis, Ronan Keating gave us tickets to see his show from the third row of The Point
  • 311
  • Sum 41 @Warped Tour 2001
  • Our Lady Peace x2
  • The Living End @ Indie club in Orlando with Chelsea. We were 17 and too young for a Yukon!
  • The Roots @UCF Homecoming
  • The Arctic Monkeys @Hard Rock Orlando
  • Aventura @Hard Rock Sunrise. Hannah’s 22nd Birthday gift
  • Spice Girls @ Prudential Center, Newark NJ. SOO worth it
  • Coldplay @ That Arena in Orlando. While working a hotdog booth
  • Flight of the Conchords @UM
  • Buzz Bake Sale 2009: Skindred, Panic at the Disco
  • Vampire Weekend @ The Fillmore
  • Brad Paisley @Cruzan Amphitheatre. Actually paid $$ for a ticket.
  • Jessica Simpson and Alan Jackson @The Chilli Fest. Ill-fated trousers
  • Lady Sovereign and Gwen Stefani @Cruzan Amphitheater
  • Jordin Sparks and Britney Spears @American Airlines Arena
  • Radiohead @Cruzan Amphitheatre. Eventful night.
  • Ke$ha and Rihanna @American Airlines Arena
  • Everclear @Old School Square, Delray Beach. Free concert at the Garlic festival
  • Electric Picnic 2010: Janelle Monae, LCD Soundsystem, Friendly Fires, Mumford and Son, Japanese Popstars, Leftfield, Robyn
  • MGMT -@ Fillmore Miami Beach
  • Metric  @Art Basel 2010. Free concert on Miami beach. On the beach.